wonderings on happy and sad

what makes a good day good? some say optimism and pessimism, the ol' half-cup full, half-cup empty pervade one's perspective by a matter of choice. is that true? can i really choose to see the half-cup full even in the midst of my emptiness? of course, in the favor of the attitude-by-choice proponents, stories such as Life is Beautiful are amazing in that someone chose to see the good in the ugly. well, here's where i stand. say, five years ago, i would have described myself as the cheerleader-- the one who keeps others going, the one who dances for hours on end (literally), the one with a smile from ear to ear. now, I have become a full-fledged pessimist. is this what people talk about when they say that we grow bitter with age? where is my eternal youth? my inner child? my sunny-side-up??? There is some room for change: in certain situations my outlook changes as if someone just opened the wooden blinds to a brilliant sunrise. It's up to me to find out where the sun shines and bring it back into my gloominess. More Pooh, less Eeyore, please.